It sucks sleeping alone….

Sometimes habits form really really fast. I mean like REALLY fast. Take for example my most recent habit. Sleeping with RJ. Now when I say sleeping with, I mean sleeping in the same bed, not having sex although that may just happen in the future. But recently RJ and I have spent 5 out of 6 nights together… That shit is habit forming!! You always have the other person there, you feel their touch, their warm body up against you on cold nights…. And so it sucks when they aren’t there. It feels down right shitty, like there is something missing in your sleep.

And so yes, RJ is a new guy…. James didn’t work out he flat out just stopped returning my texts. Just out of the blue no more texting. Whatever. SEE YA! But I went out last weekend and to a fraternity and theres a bunch of the new freshman and we were just talking and having a good time and I found out later that RJ was asking about me and asking one of my upperclassmen friends to hook us up. Weeelll, I was ALL for that because he is super hilarious, fun, attractive.. pretty much everything I want in a guy. So we hung out all night, maybe made out a little, and he walked me home.

Now I though that was going to be the extent of my Saturday night. Thats a pretty darn good night to me! But lo and behold who texts me? RJ! with a “do you want to come over?” ….. Thats a clown question bro, of course I do! So I do and we hang out and I spend the night there.

Now sunday rolls around, I go back to my dorm and I’m thinking everything is fine and dandy. But RJ texts me asking me to come over and watch the game. YES score one for moi! The game ends around midnight sooooo I stay there 😉

And the same thing happens monday night

And wednesday night

And thursday night

(Now granted monday, wednesday, and thursday he was drunk as a motherfucker and halfway to belligerent but that is for a later post….)

So we spend all this time together and now that he went back home for the weekend…. I feel sad and empty. I just want to cuddle with him and kiss him even if he smells like alcohol…. I miss him and its only been 6 freaking days. SIX DAYS… This could possibly be unhealthy…





Only one way to find out


About tohelpmelive

Just trying to get through the early years of life without imploding, you know? I love theatre, nature, traveling, and learning new things
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