God it’s been a long ass time

Goodness Gracious I have severely neglected this poor blog. I think it helps me track my life and get what I need to say out. There is a lot of catching up to do since I last posted. Shit my last post was march and not its september? Fuuuuck. Okay here goes nothing:

My spring semester got really crazy because of lacrosse. And to be honest, there were times where I felt so overwhelmed at everything going on that I would just sleep. Because sleeping was easier than having to deal with the homework or class. Sleep became a refuge for me. I would repeatedly miss my 830am class just to sleep more.  Also If I was staying over with someone (ahem William), I would miss class. And not even on purpose. I just kind of stopped caring.

Lacrosse also became a source of stress and anxiety. I welcomed any excuse to get out of working out or going to practice. I got pink eye because of a sinus infection and I played it up so much so I didn’t have to practice. The same thing when I got a stomach bug. i made sure to throw up at practice so I would get sent home. I feel like an awful person but I knew I really wouldn’t be playing in the games. But towards the end of the season, we had this big team talk and I felt more like a part of the team. Everyone said I was a big part of the team so that made me feel a lot better. The end of the semester as a whole was a lot better than the beginning. I think maybe once the end was in sight, I took my head out of my ass and actually started doing better. I kind of used lacrosse as a crutch, blaming lacrosse for my academic issues. Once I showed my teachers that I could actually do my work and do well, they kind of gave me some slack. I pulled up a C to an A- by the end of the semester.

Then my lacrosse told us she would be leaving. I was so upset because she was such a big help to me and such a big supporter of everything I did. She always tried to help me with a problem and she was like a mom to you while you were at college. No matter what anyone says, we are never going to find someone else like her for a coach. I love her so much it’s hard to see her go.

I think by the end, I was just ready to go home. Lucky for me, one of my best best best friends Carter moved like 10 minutes away from me so I was going to see him all the time! But what was waiting for me wasn’t exactly any better. I had a class over summer waiting for me and it was Organic Chemistry, of all classes. Plus I didn’t have much of a job either. I was doing temp work for a company but it isn’t consistent enough to make me any kind of real money after taxes. But My July schedule was madness. I was literally going to be home for all of maybe 10 days. So no one was going to hire me if I could only work for 10 days in July. I just hoped for more temp work when I was home in July and hoped for some in August. I got some work as a receptionist at a dealership, which is another post ENTIRELY.

basically I made it through the summer by the skin of my teeth and am now snugly-ish back into the routine of my college life. I’ll post more summer details later because it was a doozy.


About tohelpmelive

Just trying to get through the early years of life without imploding, you know? I love theatre, nature, traveling, and learning new things
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